Kader’s Adventure

NEW SALES INQUIRY

A store that sells husbands has just opened in New York City , where a woman may go to choose a husband. Among the instructions at the entrance is a description of how the store operates. You may visit the store ONLY ONCE !

There are six floors and the attributes of the men increase as the shopper ascends the flights. There is, however, a catch …. you may choose any man from a particular floor, or you may choose to go up a floor, but you cannot go back down except to exit the building! So, a woman goes to the Husband Store to find a husband .

On the first floor the sign on the door reads:

Floor 1 - These men have jobs and love the Lord.

The second floor sign reads:

Floor 2 - These men have jobs, love the Lord, and love kids.

The third floor sign reads:

Floor 3 - These men have jobs, love the Lord, love kids, and are extremely good looking.

‘Wow,’ she thinks, but feels compelled to keep going.

She goes to the fourth floor and sign reads:

Floor 4 - These men have jobs, love the Lord, love kids, are drop-dead good looking and help with the housework.

‘Oh, mercy me!’ she exclaims, ‘I can hardly stand it!’ Still, she goes to the fifth floor and sign reads:

Floor 5 - These men have jobs, love the Lord, love kids, are drop- dead gorgeous, help with the housework, and have a strong romantic
streak.

She is so tempted to stay, but she goes to the sixth floor and the sign reads:

Floor 6 - You are visitor 4,363,012 to this floor. There are no men on this floor. This floor exists solely as proof that women are
impossible to please.

Thank you for shopping at the Husband Store. Watch your step as you exit the building, and have a nice day!

Please send this to all men for a good laugh and to all the women who can handle the truth!
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KHIDMAT NASIHAT

Ada sorang lelaki bernama Ali, baru buka perniagaan khidmat nasihat.

Officenya amat canggih, sederet dengan beberapa ofis yang lain. Ali seorang pakar perunding perniagaan, baru tamat belajar diluar negara, jadi nak mencuba nasib dalam bidang pernigaan, tekad tak mahu kerja ngan orang lain. Ofis dia masih baru, baru renovate la katakan.

Selepas sebulan ofis dibuka, perniagaan Ali masih belum bergerak,sampai sekarang satu bisnes pun tak dapat lagi.Sampai sekarang sorang pun belum pernah singgah kat ofis/kedai dia tu.Ali pening, signboard kat luar ofis dia tu mahal tuuuuu, beribu ringgit. Lobi sambut tetamu canggih tu, cuma belum ada pekerja lagi, Ali sorang2 je handle.

Pada satu hari, ada lelaki masuk kedai dia, apa lagi Ali pun berasa bangga giler, 1st customer la katakan, Ali cepat2 duduk kat meja dia, ambil phone telekom atas meja dia tu, berlakon olok olok bercakap dengan seseorang, saje je nak tunjuk perniagaan dia memang bagus giler, perniagaan ribu2 ringgit.Sambil menyuruh lelaki tu duduk depan dia, dan suruh tunggu kejap kerana dia masih cakap kat phone tu (padahal belakon aje), ini perbualan Ali ditalipon.

‘Ye Dato’, ooo pasal project tu dato’, saya akan uruskan dato’, ala

dato’ bayar kat saya beratus ribu, takkan saya main2 buat kerja ni

dato’, lagi pun sudah terlalu banyak perniagaan yang menjadi bukti

kejayaan kami, itu dah cukup mengambarkan keberkesanan

perkhidmatan kami..ok dato’… baik dato’.. Oklah dato’..nanti kita

jumpa kat hotel hilton malam ni.. ok dato’.. bye’

Ali pun meletakkan talipon.Dan mula bersembang dengan lelaki yang duduk terkebil-kebil di depannya tadi, menunggu Ali.

‘Ya encik, terima kasih kerana memerlukan khidmat nasihat perniagaan kami, maaf kerana menunggu tadi, maklumlah perniagaan kami terlalu pesat berkembang, tak menang tangan, banyak sangat permintaan.Ya, ada apa yang kami boleh bantu dalam perniagaan encik’ tanya Ali.

Lelaki tu menjawab ‘ Saya technician Telekom, nak sambungkan line telepon tu, magic gak encik ni, macamana boleh guna phone kalau tak de line..

Whatta f…?? (>_<)"
————————————————————————————————–
KISAH TELINGA

Johan dilahirkan tanpa kedua telinganya, tetapi walaupun cacat dia berjawatan tinggi di sebuah bank. Dia sangat marah kalu ada orang yang mempersoalkan tentang telinga.

Satu hari dia mahu mengambil kerani baru dan tiga orang disenarai pendek untuk sesi temuduga. Calon pertama seorang lelaki yang mempunyai penampilan yang baik.
Di akhir temuduga, Johan bertanya satu soalankepada lelaki itu.

"Awak nampak tak sesuatu yang ganjil pada saya?".

"Ya, tapi minta maaf kalau saya kata tuan tak ada telinga, macam ayam" jawab lelaki itu dengan jujur.

Merasa terhina dengan jawapan itu, Johan mengusirnya keluar dari pejabat.

Calon kedua ialah seorang perempuan yang berpengalaman bekerja di bank hampir 5 tahun. Dia lebih baik dari calon pertama tadi. Di akhir sesi temuduga, Johan bertanya soalan yang sama ditanya pada calon pertama.

"Awak nampak tak sesuatu yang ganjil pada saya?".

"Ya …saya heran bagaimana tuan boleh mendengar saya dengan baik, sedangkan tuan duduk jauh dari saya." puji perempuan itu.

Sebaik mendengar jawapan dari perempuan itu, Johan berang dan menghalaunya keluar. Calon terakhir adalah yang terbaik, walaupun masih muda dia telah bekerja lebih 8 tahun di bank.

Selain bijak dia juga tampan dan bergaya.
Seperti calon terdahulu Johan bertanya soalan serupa.

"Awak nampak tak sesuatu yang ganjil pada saya?"

"Ya. Awak pakai contact lens," jawab pemuda itu menahan perasannya dari tergelak.

Walaupun terkejut, Johan gembira dengan jawapan pemuda itu. Dia hairan kerana pemuda itu sangat teliti dan dapat melihatnya memakai contact lens walaupun mereka duduk agak jauh.

"Bagaimana awak tahu" tanya Johan lagi.

Pemuda itu tidak dapat lagi menahan gelihatinya lalu ketawa besar hingga jatuh terguling-guling sambil berkata,

"Dah tentu tuan tak boleh pakai cermin mata sebab tuan tak ada telinga, nak sangkut kat mana".

Huargh! Huargh! Huargh! Huargh!
——————————————————————————————–
kISAH CERMIN

Ini kisah pasal sepasang suami dan isteri orang asli yang tinggal di dalam hutan. Rumah dorang ni dibina di atas pokok… 2 tingkat lagi tu. Si suami kerja nya mencari makanan di hutan, sama ada dengan pergi berburu ataupun memetik buah-buah hutan. Si isteri pula tinggal mengemas dirumah.

Suatu hari, Si suami pergi mencari makanan dihutan. Sedang
mencari-cari.. tiba-tiba dia terjumpa cermin. Dia pon awak balik cermin tu dan disimpankan cermin tersebut di tingkat atas rumahnya tanpa pengetahun isterinya.

Setiap hari sebelum pergi keluar mencari makanan, dia akan masuk ke bilik dan melihat cerminnya. Sehinggalah satu hari, si isteri naik pelik melihat telatah suaminya tu..

Maka disiasatlah bilik yang selalu dimasuki oleh suaminya..
bimbang-bimbang kalau suaminya menyimpan perempuan lain di bilik tersebut tanpa pengetahuannya..

Dan punyalah terkejut beruk.. dia masuk je bilik tu.. di ternampak cermin suaminya. Oleh kerana si isteri ni taktau cermin tu apa.. so,dia ingat orang dalam cermin tu memang perempuan simpanan suaminya.

Apa lagi.. habis berlari dan meraung menangisla dia cari mak nya..

Lepas berjumpa dengan maknya.. mak dia cakap nak lihat sendiri perempuan yang kononnya disembunyikan oleh suaminya tu..

Lalu maknya pon masuk ke bilik tersebut.

Kemudian keluar dari bilik tersebut sambil ketawa terbahak-bahak.. 

Isteri : Apsal mak ketawa?..
Mak : Apa teruk benor selere suami ko tu.. kalau ye pon nak kawin lain.. carik la perempuan yang elok sikit.. Ini tak.. aku tengok perempuan kat bilik tu.. dah la tua.. hodoh, gigi hitam lak tu… !!!!
——————————————————————————————
Najis Kecil, Najis Besar

Semoga dijadikan iktibar bukan bahan ketawa, hari ni hari dia mungkin besok hari kita.

Betul tak. Masa zaman kami dulu tok imam tu tanya "ko orang islam nak kawin nak cuba tanya soalan sikit yang saya ingat. :-

a) Cuba Mengucap
b) Apa rukun dan fardunya.

Berpeluh juga BEB.

Pada cuti hari minggu yang lalu, aku menghadiri Satu Majlis akad nikah kawan pada kawan ku. Waktu tu aku bercuti dikampung dia. Jadi bila ada kenduri macam tu dia pun pergi dan ajak aku sekali. Aku pun ikut sama. Masa tu majlis akad nikah tu dijalankan diruang tamu. Ramai orang aku tengok, sambil duduk bersila mengelilingi tok kadi dan pengantin lelaki. Dahsyat, pengantin tu duduk atas bantal macam raja. Aku jarang tengok majlis macam nih. Jadi masa bersila tu, aku pun mengesot sikit2 untuk dengar apa yang tok kadi akan tanya. Rupanya macam2 jugak tok kadi tanya.

Tapi ada satu soalan yang menyebabkan aku malu besar…..Tok kadi tanya pasal satu hari berapa kali kene sembahyang, dengan lajunye mamat pengantin tu jawab "lima". Tok kadi tanya lagi, bagi contoh2 najis kecil, dia pun jawap kencing baby yang kecik2 lagi. Tok kadi pun angguk ler, jadi aku rasa jawapan tu ok la kut.

Tok kadi tanya lagi contoh najis besar, mamat tu mula dah panik, jeling kiri, jeling kanan, mula tengok syiling, aku rasa macam nak tolong je mamat pengantin tu…bukannye susah, jawapannya anjing ngan babi je,..tapi mamat tu dah mula berpeluh jantan keluar kat dahi….tok kadi mula senyum…

Aku sebut dalam hati moga2 dia dengar ‘anjing ngan babi la hoi’, tapi rupanya aku cakap dalam hati dia tak dengar. Aku tak tahu apa yang jadi selepas itu, kerana majlis tu jadi kecoh kerana ramai orang yang berada disekeliling majlis tu sambil minum air sirap, tersembur keluar minuman tu terkena baju ramai orang, aku pun sama, masa tu aku tengah minum sirap tu, tiba2 aku semburkan balik, dah kene member kat tepi2, kecoh jadinya, aku pegang mata aku, penuh dengan air mata.

Yang aku ingat masa tok kadi tanya tentang contoh najis besar kat pengantin tu keadaan senyap sunyi….tapi bila pengantin tu jawap "Taik Gajah" suasana jadik hingar bingar dengan gelak ketawa orang yang dah tak boleh tahan, nak control macamana …taik gajah… besar betul..nak2 bila gajah makan durian.

—- sumbangan: Jas
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THE MALAYSIAN SOCIAL CONTRACT

Posted by Dr. Mahathir Mohamad at July 12, 2008 11:27 AM

1. Before there was Malaya and Malaysia the peninsular was known as Tanah Melayu, or Malay Land.

2. Saying this alone would result in accusations of being racist.

3. But I need to go back in history if I am going to be able to explain about Malaysia’s social contract.

4. Through treaties signed by the Rulers of the Malay States of the Peninsular the British acquired the right to rule the Malay States. These treaties obviously recognised and legitimised the States as Malay States. No one disputed this. Even the aborigines accepted this as shown by their submission to the rule of the Malay Sultans.

5. Initially the peoples living in the States were divided into indigenous Malays and aborigines who were subjects of the Malay rulers and foreign guests who were not subjects of the rulers. There were no citizenship or documents about citizenship status as in most countries.

6. The foreign guests prospered in the British ruled Malay States and in the British colonies of Penang, Malacca and Singapore. The Malay subjects of the Rulers and the Rulers themselves did not feel threatened by the numbers of these non-Malays and the disparities between the general wealth and progress of the foreign guests and the subjects of the Rulers. They did not think that the foreigners who had settled in the country would ever demand citizenship rights.

7. When Japan conquered the Malay States and the colonies of the Straits Settlements, the Chinese felt insecure as the Japanese were their historical enemies.

8. Many Chinese formed and joined guerilla forces and disappeared into the jungle. When Japan surrendered the Chinese guerillas came out and seized many police stations in the interior and declared that they were the rulers of the country. They seized many people, Chinese and Malays and executed a number of them.

9. Malay villagers retaliated by killing the Chinese in the rural areas. Tension rose and a Sino-Malay war was only averted because of the arrival of British forces. But the ill feeling and animosity between the two races remained high.

10. It was in this tensed situation that the British proposed the Malayan Union which would give the "guests" the right of citizenship as indistinguishable from that of the Malays.

11. The Malays rejected the Malayan Union and its citizenship proposal. They forced the British to return to the status quo ante in a new Federation of Malaya.

12. Only Chinese who were British subjects in the colonies of the Straits Settlements were eligible to become citizens in this new Federation. Naturally the Malay citizens far outnumbered the Chinese Malayan citizens.

13. Chinese leaders appealed to the British, who then persuaded the UMNO President, Dato Onn Jaafar to propose to open UMNO to all races. This proposal was rejected by the other UMNO leaders and Dato Onn had to resign.

14. The British kept up the pressure for the Malays to be more liberal with citizenship for non-Malays.

15. Tunku Abdul Rahman, the President of UMNO decided on a coalition with MCA (Malaysian Chinese Association) and the MIC (Malaysian Indian Congress). In the 1955 elections to the Federal Legislative Assembly, since there were very few constituencies with Chinese or Indian majorities, the MCA and MIC partners had to put up candidates in Malay majority constituencies after UMNO undertook not to contest in these constituencies but to support MCA Chinese and MIC Indian candidates instead.

16. Such was the support of the Malays for the MCA and MIC alliance candidates that they won even against Malay candidates from PAS. The MCA and MIC candidates all won. Only UMNO lost one constituency against PAS.

17. The Tunku as Chief Minister of a self-governing Federation of Malaya then decided to go for independence. The British continued to inisist on citizenship rights for the Chinese and Indians as a condition for giving independence.

18. To overcome British resistance to independence and to gain the support of the Chinese and Indians, the Tunku decided to give one million citizenship to the two communities based purely on residence. One notable new citizen was (Tun) Leong Yew Koh, a former general in the Chinese National Army who was later appointed Governor of Malacca.

19. It was at this stage that the leaders of the three communal parties who had formed the Government of self-governing British Federation of Malaya, discussed and reached agreement on the relationship between the three communities in an independent Federation of Malaya.

20. It was to be a quid pro quo arrangement. In exchange for the one million citizenships the non-Malays must recognise the special position of the Malays as the indigenous people. Certain laws such as the pre-eminence of Islam as the state religion, the preservation of Malay reserve land, the position of the Malay Rulers and Malay customs and the distribution of Government jobs were included in the understanding.

21. On the question of national language it was agreed that Malay would be the national language. English should be the second language. The Chinese and Indians could continue to use their own languages but not in official communication.

22. Chinese and Tamil primary schools can use their languages as teaching media. They can also be used in secondary schools but these have to be private schools.

23. For their part the Chinese and Indian leaders representing their parties and communities demanded that their citizenship should be a right which could not be annulled, that they should retain their language, religion and culture, that as citizens they should have political rights as accorded to all citizens.

24. Much of these agreements and understandings are reflected in the Federal Constitution of Independent Malaya. For everything that is accorded the Malays, there is always a provision for non-Malays. Few ever mention this fact. The only thing that attracts everyone’s attention and made a subject of dispute is what is accorded the Malays and other indigenous people.

25. Thus although Malay is to be the National Language, Chinese and Tamil can be used freely and in the Chinese and Tamil schools. In no other country has there been a similar provision. Even the most liberal countries do not have this constitutional guarantee.

26. The national language is to be learnt by everyone so that Malayan citizens can communicate with each other everywhere.

27. It was understood also that the Chinese language referred in the understanding were the Chinese dialects spoken in Malaysia, not the national language of China. Similarly for Malayan Indians the language was Tamil, not Hindi or Urdu or whatever became the national language of India. However, the Chinese educationists later insisted that the Chinese language must be the national language of China i.e. Mandarin.

28. The official religion is Islam but other religions may be practised by their adherents without any restriction. As the official religion, Islam would receive Government support. Nothing was said about support for the other religions. The non-Malays did not press this point and the Federal Constitution does not mention Government support for the other religions. Nevertheless such support have been given.

29. A quota was fixed for the Malayan Civil Service wherein the Malays would get four posts for every one given to Chinese or Indians. However it was recognised that the professional post would be open to all races as it was never thought possible there would be enough Malays to take up these posts.

30. The result was that in the early years of independence there were more non-Malays in Division 1 than Malays.

31. The Agong or the Rulers of the States should determine quotas of scholarships and licences for Malays. But no one should be deprived of whatever permits or licences in order to give to Bumiputras.

32. The position of the Malay Rulers was entrenched and could not be challenged. There would be a Paramount Ruler chosen from among the nine Rulers who would serve for five years.

33. The rulers were to be constitutional rulers. Executive power was to be exercised by elected Menteris Besar, Ketua Menteri (Chief Minister) and Prime Minister, assisted by members of councils and cabinets. The British practice was to be the model.

34. The most important understanding was the adoption of Parliamentary Democracy with a Constitutional Monarch, again after the United Kingdom model. It should be remembered that the British imposed an authoritarian colonial Government on the Malay State, the power resting with the Colonial Office in London.

35. Before these the Malay States were feudal with the Malay Rulers enjoying near absolute power. Only the elites played a role in State politics. The Malay subjects had no political rights at all. Certainly the guests had no say in politics. Even the Chinese and Indian British citizens had no say though they may be appointed as Municipal or Legislative Councillors.

36. The decision to adopt a democratic system of Government was a radical step in the governance of the Federation of Malaya and of the Malay States. This was agreed to by the leaders of the three major communities as represented by their political parties i.e. UMNO, MCA and MIC. There can be no doubt that these parties represented the vast majority of the three communities in Malaya. The Communists and the other leftists did not signify their agreement to the understanding.

37. The Reid Commission was briefed on all these agreements and understanding so that they will be reflected in the Constitution to be drawn up. All the three parties approved this Constitution after several amendments were made. In effect the Constitution became a contract binding on all the three communities in the Federation of Malaya upon attaining independence in 1957.

38. When Sabah and Sarawak joined the Peninsular States to form Malaysia the social contract was extended to the two Borneo States. The natives of Sabah and Sarawak were given the same status as the Malays. At this time the word Bumiputra was introduced to distinguish the indigenous Malays and Sabah, Sarawak natives from those descendants of foreign immigrants. Because Malay was widely used in the Borneo States there was no difficulty in the acceptance of Malay as the national language. The fact that the natives of the two states are not all Muslims necessitated no change in the Constitution once the word Bumiputra was accepted. But the official definition of a Malay remained.

39. The embodiment of the social contract is therefore the Constitution of first, the Federation of Malaya and then Malaysia.

40. To say it does not exist is to deny the contents of the Constitution which was based upon the acceptance by the leaders of the three communities of the original social contract.

41. All subsequent actions by the Government were the results of this social contract. The fact that the initiators of this social contract and their successors were endorsed by the people in every election reflects the undertaking of the people to honour this social contract.

42. Saying that the social contract does not exist is like saying that Malaysia exists in a vacuum, without a Constitution and laws based on this Constitution.

43. Implementing the social contract requires understanding of its spirit as much as the letter. The social contract is aimed at creating a multi-racial nation that is stable and harmonious. Any factor which would cause instability and result in confrontation between the races must be regarded as incompatible with the spirit of the social contract.

44. For 50 years no one seriously questioned the social contract. Even today the majority of Chinese and Indians and the indigenous Malays and natives of Sabah and Sarawak accept the social contract. But because Dato Seri Abdullah Ahmad Badawi basically lost the 2008 election and now heads a weak Government the extremists and erstwhile detractors have questioned the social contract. The Bar Council has now become a political party believing that its expertise in law will exempt it from being questioned as to its credentials and its political objectives.

45. Abdullah’s UMNO is incapable of countering any attack on the social contract. If anything untoward happens Abdullah and UMNO must bear responsibility.

*****

Multi-racial Malaysia

I have been asked “What is the meaning of a multi-racial Malaysia to me?”

Being
multi-racial does not mean the same thing to every multi-racial country
e.g. Singapore claims to be multi-racial but basically it is a
predominantly Chinese State.

Because of the refusal of the
descendants of migrants from China and India to be assimilated by the
indigenous people we have to accept the retention of the identity of
Malaysian citizens of Chinese and Indian origin. The people of
Indonesian origin chose to be assimilated by the indigenous people, so
they don’t constitute a separate entity.

Multi-racial
countries are usually unstable. Racial conflicts occur frequently. If
Malaysia is to avoid racial conflicts it must try to reduce the
differences between the different races.

We cannot change ethnicity. So we have to accept the ethnic differences. Religious differences also cannot be changed.

However,
various aspects of the cultures can be made common. Chinese food in
Malaysia reflect the influence of Malay and Indian tastes. We can
celebrate each other’s festivals etc. etc.

But economic
disparities pose a major problem. Yet this is one area where
corrections can be made and can reduce tension in a multi-racial
society.

If we care to look we would notice that even in a
single ethnic country, disparities in wealth distribution lead to
conflicts. The principal reason why the Socialist and Communist
ideologies were formulated and then espoused by the working class is
because of the extreme disparities of wealth between the workers and
the employers. But Socialism and Communism tended to reduce economic
growth, causing not only the rich to suffer but also the poor.

Trade
Unions also tend to stunt economic growth, as they are often abused as
for example the holding of nationwide strikes for political reasons.

These
confrontations between workers and employers, basically between poor
and rich, happens quite often even in single-ethnic countries.

Now
if the workers and the poor are made up largely of one race in a
multi-racial country and the employers are rich and are of another
race, then class confrontation would be amplified by racial animosity.
That was the basic situation in Malaysia pre-1969, and we know the
results.

The Malay, Chinese and Indian leaders of that time
agreed that the disparities in wealth between the races must be
corrected. That is why we introduced the New Economic Policy which
proposes to eliminate the identification of race with economic
functions.

Unfortunately the affirmative action we have to
undertake must result in discrimination against Chinese and Indians in
favour of the Bumiputera. This caused resentment because even the
economically prosperous race must have a fair number of poor members.
These people will feel the discrimination more acutely.

The
other leg of the NEP is to eradicate poverty irrespective of race. From
surveys it is clear that there is more poverty among the indigenous
people than among the Chinese. It is therefore more likely for poverty
among the Chinese to be self- eradicated than among the Malays and the
natives of Sabah and Sarawak. Unfortunately the Indian leaders did not
address the problem of Indian poverty.

If we are going to
correct the imbalance it is necessary to try to reduce poverty among
the indigenous people more than among the Chinese. However, where the
Chinese poor show exceptional abilities, as for example getting
brilliant examination results, they should not be deprived of help
simply because they belong to a more prosperous race.

The
affirmative action of the NEP is good in principle but along the way
there were misapplications and failures. Nevertheless since 1969 we
have seen no major racial conflicts in Malaysia. Also despite the NEP
and its imperfections, Malaysia has remained far more stable than most
other multi-racial or even single ethnic countries. And economic growth
in Malaysia belie the assumed negative effects of the NEP.

I
feel sure that if we can reduce economic disparities between Malaysians
they would not be too conscious or too insistent on being identified by
their racial origins. They would still be Malays, Chinese, Indians,
Muruts, Bajaus, Dayaks etc. but they would be less hostile and critical
of each other.

Malaysian races are symbiotic and they really
complement each other. Even though multi-racial Malaysia will still be
ethnically multi-racial, Malaysia would remain relatively peaceful,
capable of good economic growth and exhibit relative harmony between
races if the leadership of the country understands this problem and
knows how to manage.

That is as much as we can hope for since we
are opposed to the adoption of a single mother tongue and culture and
to dropping the identification with the countries our ancestors came
from.

credited to chedet.com.

A couple was golfing one day on a very, very exclusive golf course lined with million-dollar houses.

On the third tee, the husband said, "Honey, be very careful when you drive the ball. Don’t knock out any windows. It’ll cost us a fortune to fix."

The wife teed up and shanked it right through the window of the biggest house on the course.

The husband cringed and said, "I told you to watch out for the houses. All right, let’s go up there, apologize, and see how much this is going to cost."

They walked up and knocked on the door. A voice said, "Come on in. They opened the door and saw glass all over the floor and a broken bottle lying on its side in the foyer.

A man on the couch said, "Are you the people who broke my window?"

"Uh, yeah. Sorry about that," the husband replied.

"No, actually, I want to thank you. I’m a genie who was trapped for a thousand years inside that bottle. You’ve released me. I’m allowed to grant three wishes - I’ll give you each one wish, and I’ll keep the last one for myself."

"Okay, great!" the husband said. "I want a million dollars a year for the rest of my life."

"No problem - it’s the least I could do. And you, what do you want?" the genie said, looking at the wife.

"I want a house in every country of the world," she said.

"Consider it done," the genie replied.

"And what’s your wish, genie?", the husband said.

"Well, since I’ve been trapped in that bottle, I haven’t had sex with a woman in a thousand years. My wish is to sleep with your wife."

The husband looked at the wife and said, "Well, we did get a lot of money and all those houses, honey. I guess I don’t care."

The genie took the wife upstairs and ravished her for two hours.

After it was over, the genie rolled over, looked at the wife, and said, "How old is your husband, anyway?"

"Thirty-five," she replied.

"And he still believes in genies? … That’s amazing."  :p :p