Archive for December, 2007

26
Dec

MAJLIS KAHWIN: ORANG KAYA VS ORANG MISKIN

sekadar berkongsi …. dari email yang
diterima …. maklumlaaa musim orang
naik pelamin skarang nih…


MUSIM orang kahwin, tentulah cerita
orang kahwin juga yang mendapat tempat.
Sana sini majlis perkahwinan
berlangsung. Yang kecil, yang besar, yang
glamor dan yang sunyi sepi. Yang
penting, impian pasangan untuk hidup
bersama telah tercapai. Dan pastinya
cerita yang ingin saya kongsi dengan
pembaca minggu ini juga berkaitan dengan
majlis kahwin.


Apa tidaknya, ramai
yang menelefon ingin berkongsi pandangan
mengenai majlis perkahwinan
sekarang.

Setelah meneliti dan mencari yang
terbaik saya memilih untuk berkongsi
pendapat Datin W.


Perbualan kami yang
mengambil masa selama hampir sejam
menceritakan segala-galanya tentang
perbezaan kahwin orang miskin dan kahwin
orang kaya.

"Miskin yang dimaksudkan adalah orang
kurang berada yang hanya membuat
kenduri kahwin di rumah, tidak di dewan
atau hotel bertaraf lima bintang,"
demikian Datin W memulakan bicaranya.


Datin W telah menghadiri sembilan majlis
perkahwinan sepanjang cuti sekolah
baru-baru ini. Ada banyak beza, katanya.
Lalu dia namakan majlis itu kahwin
orang miskin dan kahwin orang kaya.

"Lima daripada majlis tersebut diadakan
di hotel dan dewan yang bertaraf
lima bintang sementara empat lagi di
rumah. Saya pergi ke semua majlis itu
bagi memenuhi undangan kawan-kawan lama
dan rakan sepejabat.


Di tempat
bertaraf lima bintang memang menarik dan
serba serbi canggih. Makanan
terhidang depan mata, siap ada napkin,
bunga terletak indah di tengah meja,
makanan diletakkan dalam bekas cantik.
Siap ada kopi, teh dan pemanis mulut.
Kerusi juga beriben dan beralas indah.
Sayangnya, letih menunggu berjam-jam
sehinggakan perut mula berjoget kerana
lapar," kata Datin W.


Menurut Datin W, sudahlah terpaksa
datang awal untuk mencari parkir dan
berbaris untuk masuk ke dewan. Kemudian
macam orang bodoh, melilau mencari
kerusi yang entah di mana letaknya.
Kalau tempat duduk bebas lebih mudah,
tapi yang ada nombor parahlah. Terpaksa
pula berlegar-legar mencari tempat
duduk.


Kalau nasib baik ada penyambut
tetamu cekap, lekaslah dapat duduk.
Jika tidak macam kerang busuk
terhegeh-hegeh mencari kerusi.

Pernah melalui pengalaman yang sama,
saya mencelah dengan berkata, biasanya
majlis yang mewah itu ada penyambut
tetamu.


Bagaimana boleh jadi macam itu?

"Memang ada penyambut tetamu, tetapi
kalau sudah letak yang comel lote tapi
tak tahu buat kerja susah juga. Pakai
cantik-cantik, berbaris tepi pintu dan
asyik tersenyum kepada tetamu. Bukan
hendak tolong tunjuk tempat, tapi sibuk
bergambar dan bersalam sambil
berbalas-balas gesel pipi tanpa mengira
lelaki
perempuan," tambah Datin W.


Memang betul, saya juga pernah melihat
senario ini dengan mata sendiri.
Perihal bukan muhrim tidak kira kaum dan
agama berbalas ciuman di pipi pada
majlis orang kahwin sudah menjadi trend
masyarakat kelas ‘atasan’ sejak
akhir-akhir ini.


Tidak berhenti di situ sahaja, Datin W
turut menegur sikap segelintir tetamu
yang ada pangkat tetapi tidak tahu
menghormati tetamu lain.

"Saya malu dan kecewa dengan sikap
orang-orang ini. Ada jawatan tinggi, ada
pangkat dan pakai lawa tapi otak tidak
boleh berfikir pentingkan diri
sahaja," suaranya agak meninggi.


Mendengar suaranya yang agak tinggi,
saya bertanya kenapa.

"Bayangkan kita sudah berbaris panjang,
tiba-tiba di depan ada satu hamba
Allah berpangkat jumpa kawan dia
sepasang suami isteri, bersalam kemudian
disuruh masuk barisan di hadapannya.
"Kemudian datang seorang lagi, juga
disuruh masuk, sehingga genap lima
pasangan kawan mereka memotong Q.
Sakitnya hati kita! Sekurang-kurangnya
hormatkan tetamu lain. Ini tidak,
mentang-mentang mereka ada nama, orang
kenal, boleh buat sesuka hati,"
tambah Datin W.


Di dalam dewan pula, kata Datin W,
suasananya memang cantik. Pokok bunga di
sana sini, layar pun ada untuk tetamu
yang duduk jauh dari pelamin. Tapi
sayangnya dek kerana pokok-pokok bunga
yang tinggi menjulang macam dalam
hutan, pandangan sebahagian tetamu
terlindung. Yang kelihatan hanya hujung
kepala pengantin, tiang pelamin dan
kepala tetamu lain.


Saya tersenyum sendiri. Mati akal saya
untuk menjawab kata-kata Datin W.
Lalu saya meminta pendapatnya terhadap
apa yang dikatakannya sebagai kenduri
di rumah orang miskin.

"Ini yang saya hendak cerita. Banyak
bezanya macam langit dengan bumi.


Saya
pergi empat buah rumah teman sekerja
saya yang menerima menantu. Makanan
dihidang secara bufet. Ada yang
katering, ada yang masih gotong royong
memasak. Paling kurang ada lima enam
jenis lauk dan buah-buahan sebagai
pencuci mulut. Dua daripada rumah itu
siap disediakan teh tarik, kopi O dan
bubur kacang.


"Tetamu boleh enjoy makan sambil
sembang-sembang tengok pengantin
bersanding. Selepas bersanding,
pengantin dan ibu bapa datang bawah khemah
menyapa tetamu sambil mengucapkan terima
kasih dan bersalaman.


Tidak payah
berbaris, tunggu dua jam baru hendak
makan. Boleh ambil sendiri dan makan
sepuas hati, tiada siapa melarang,”
jelasnya.

Berbeza dengan majlis orang kaya,
pengantin dan tuan rumah tunggu depan
pintu, habis tetamu kenamaan beredar,
mereka pun lesap.


Tinggal tetamu
terkapai-kapai mencari jalan pulang.

Kali ini saya bersetuju dengan Datin W
kerana apa yang diucapkannya benar
belaka. Lebih selesa menghadiri majlis
kahwin orang miskin daripada ke
majlis orang kaya.


Kalau ke rumah orang
biasa, letak sahaja kereta di mana,
tepi jalan, padang atau kawasan lapang,
asal jangan halang laluan orang.
Tapi kalau di tempat lima bintang,
berpusing lima enam kali belum nampak
parkir kosong, kira pi kira mai,
bayarannya sama banyak dengan makan nasi
kandar di restoran mamak.


Dalam berfikir saya dikejutkan dengan
suara Datin W yang masih bersemangat
untuk bercerita lagi tentang majlis
kahwin orang kaya.

"Bukan setakat itu sahaja, tetamu yang
datang juga alahai memang berfesyen
habis, kebanyakannya berfesyen macam
hendak ke festival filem. Seksi dan
menjolok mata pun ada, nak glamor punya
pasal, tidak tahu beza majlis,"
tambahnya.


Kata-kata Datin W mengingatkan saya
kepada satu kumpulan anak-anak remaja
yang menghadiri majlis kahwin dengan
menaiki kereta Mercedes. Empat orang
dalam sebuah kereta, ertinya dua pasang.
Cantik, tampan dan segak. Mereka
memakai baju Melayu lengkap bersamping
sementara anak daranya pula memakai
kebaya lis jarang dengan tiub bertutup
bahagian dada dan perut sahaja.
Padanannya kain batik diikat pario
sehingga ke paras peha. Bayangkan!


"Apakah pesanan kepada orang di luar
sana yang mungkin keliru dengan
pendapat Datin?” soal saya yang cuba
membakar semangatnya.


"Pesanan saya, jangan rasa rendah diri
jika tidak dijemput ke majlis kahwin
orang kaya, jangan rasa terhina bila
asyik ke majlis orang miskin. Kaya atau
miskin bukan ukurannya. Yang penting
jemputan tuan rumah dipenuhi."


"Apa pun," kata Datin W, "kita semua
sama di sisi Tuhan. Yang berbeza
hanyalah pangkat, darjat dan kemewahan
yang juga dianugerahkan Tuhan. Jangan
sesekali lupa.”


Saya hargai pandangan Datin W yang
berpengalam
an luas dalam perkara ini.
Jika direnung semula, betul juga
katanya. Majlis perkahwinan juga kini
semakin sengit. Persaingan makin hebat.
Seperti juga Datin W, saya turut
mengalami pengalaman yang berharga.


Buat
pertama kali dalam sejarah, saya
dan teman-teman pulang dengan tangan
kosong daripada majlis perkahwinan
orang kaya baru-baru ini sedangkan ramai
tetamu glamor membawa dua tiga
cenderamata setiap seorang.

Bezanya, pada hari yang sama, pada
majlis kahwin orang miskin yang kami
hadiri, kami dibekalkan buah tangan,
sebuah beg kertas penuh dengan kuih
tradisional, gula-gula, kek dan sapu
tangan dan bunga telur yang cantik.


Apa
sudah jadi? Ada diskriminasi juga kah?
Apa pun bukan buah tangan yang jadi
impian, tetapi menghargai jemputan. Pada
masa yang sama seronok melihat
lakonan manusia di pentas dunia!


Menutup kata, terimalah serangkap pantun
daripada saya.

Anggerik rimba kembang serumpun
Kiambang di tasik jadi pilihan

Tercalar adat sopan dan santun
Ambil iktibar jadikan teladan.

25
Dec

Pilot Jokes

Pilot Jokes

1. On reaching his plane seat a man is surprised to see a parrot
strapped in next to him. He asks the stewardess for a coffee where upon the parrot squawks "And get me a whisky you cow!" The stewardess, flustered, brings back a whisky for the parrot and forgets the coffee.
When this omission is pointed out to her the parrot drains its glass and bawls "And get me another whisky you b^&%h". Quite upset, the girl comes back shaking with another whisky but still no coffee. Unaccustomed to such slackness the man tries the parrot’s approach "I’ve asked you twice for a coffee, go and get it now or I’ll kick your a^&".Next moment both he and the parrot have been wrenched up and thrown out of the emergency exit by two burly stewards. Plunging downwards the parrot turns to him and says "For someone who can’t fly you’re an idiot!"

2. After the first takeoff of the fully automatic airplane, the passengers heard the soothing, reassuring voice of the pilot: "Ladies and gentlemen, this is your automatic pilot. In my modern and carefully tested sytem an error is absolutely impossible, absolutely impossible, absolutely impossible, …"

3. While cruising at 40,000 feet, the airplane shuddered and Mr. Benson looked out the window. "Good lord!" he screamed, "one of the engines just blew up!"Other passengers left_inner their seats and came running over; suddenly the aircraft was rocked by a second blast as yet another engine exploded on the other side.The passengers were in a panic now, and even the stewardesses couldn’t maintain order. Just then, standing tall and smiling confidently, the pilot strode from the cockpit and assured everyone that there was nothing to worry about. His words and his demeanor seemed made most of the passengers feel better, and they sat down as the pilot calmly walked to the door of the aircraft. There, he grabbed several packages from under the seatsand began handing them to the flight attendants. Each crew member attatched the package to their backs."Say," spoke up an alert passenger, "aren’t those parachutes?"The pilot said they were.The passenger went on, "But I thought you said there was nothing to worry about?""There isn’t," replied the pilot as a third engine exploded. "We’re going to get help."

4. An airplane was flying from LA to New York. About an hour into the flight, the pilot announced, "We have lost an engine, but don’t worry, there are three left_inner. However, instead of 5 hours it will take 7 hours to get to New York." A little later, the pilot announced, "A second engine failed, but we still have two left_inner. However, it will take 10 hours to get to New York."Somewhat later, the pilot again came on the intercom and announced, "A third engine had died. Never fear, because the plane can fly on a single engine. However, it will now take 18 hours to get to new York."At this point, one passenger said, "Gee, I hope we don’t lose that last engine, or we’ll be up here forever!"

5. Taxiing down the tarmac, the jetliner abruptly stopped, turned around and returned to the gate. After an hour-long wait, it finally took off.A concerned passenger asked the flight attendant, "What was the problem?""The pilot was bothered by a noise he heard in the engine," explained the flight attendant, "and it took us a while to find a new pilot."

6. A pilot and a co-pilot were descending for a landing at an airport they had never been to before. The pilot looked out the windshield, and suddenly exclaimed to the co-pilot: "Holy cow! Look how short the runway is! I’ve never seen one that short!"The co-pilot looked out the windshield. "Wow! you’re right! That’s incredible! Are you sure we can make it?""Well we better, we’re almost out of fuel."
So the captain got on the intercom, and notified the passengers to put their heads between their knees, and prepare for an emergency landing. Then he set the flaps to full down, and slowed the plane to just over stall speed. The big jumbo jet came screaming in, on the ragged edge of control. The pilot’s hands were sweating, the co-pilot was praying.They touched down, and came screeching to a halt just before the edge of the runway, the tires smoking."HEW! That was CLOSE!" yelled the captain. "That runway was SHORT!""Yeah!" said the co-pilot, "and WIDE too!"

7. What’s the purpose of the propeller? To keep the pilot cool. If you don’t think so, just stop it and watch him sweat!

8. A young guy in a two-engine fighter was flying escort for a B-52 and generally being a nuisance, acting like a hotdog, flying rolls around the lumbering old bomber. The hotdog said over the air, "Anything you can do, I can do better."The veteran bomber pilot answered, "Try this hot-shot."The B-52 continued its flight, straight and level.Perplexed, the hotdog asked, "So? What did you do?""I just shut down two engines, kid."

9. "Flight 1234, for noise abatement turn right 45 degrees.."
"But Center, we are at 35,000 feet, how much noise can we make up here?" Sir, have you ever heard the noise a 707 makes when it hits a 727?"


10. Cessna: "Jones tower, Cessna 12345, student pilot, I am out of fuel." Tower: "Roger Cessna 12345, reduce airspeed to best glide!! Do you have the airfield in sight?!?!!"Cessna: "Uh…tower, I am on the south ramp; I just want to know where the fuel truck is."

11. A man telephoned an airline office in New York and asked, "How long does it take to fly to Boston?" The clerk said, "Just a minute…"
"Thank you," the man said and hung up.

12.A passenger piled his cases on the scale at an airline counter in New York and said to the clerk, "I’m flying to Los Angeles. I want the square case to go to Denver and the two round ones to go to Seattle." I’m sorry, sir, but we can’t do that."
"Why not? You did it last time?"

14
Dec

WATCH YOUR LIFE

WATCH YOUR LIFE

*Your life - your likes - you decide!!!*

A long time ago, there was an Emperor who told his horseman that if he
could ride on his horse and cover as much land area as he likes, then the Emperor would give him the area of land he has covered.

Sure enough, the horseman quickly jumped onto his horse and rode as fast as possible to cover as much land area as he could. He kept on riding and riding, whipping the horse to go as fast as possible. When he was hungry or tired, he did not stop because he wanted to cover as much area as possible.

Came to a point when he had covered a substantial area and he was exhausted and was dying. Then he asked himself, "Why did I push myself so hard to cover so much land area? Now I am dying and I only need a very small area to bury myself."

The above story is similar with the journey of our Life. We push very hard everyday to make more money, to gain power and recognition. We neglect our health , time with our family and to appreciate the surrounding beauty and the hobbies we love.

One day when we look back , we will realize that we don’t really need that much, but then we cannot turn back time for what we have missed.

Life is not about making money, acquiring power or recognition . Life is definitely not about work! Work is only necessary to keep us living so as to enjoy the beauty and pleasures of life. Life is a balance of Work and Play , Family and Personal time . You have to decide how you want to balance your Life. Define your priorities, realize what you are able to compromise but always let some of your decisions be based on your instincts. Happiness is the meaning and the purpose of Life, the whole aim of human existence.

So, take it easy, do what you want to do and appreciate nature. Life is fragile, Life is short. Do not take Life for granted. Live a balanced lifestyle and enjoy Life!

Watch your thoughts ; they become words.

Watch your words ; they become actions.

Watch your actions ; they become habits.

Watch your habits; they become character .

Watch your character; it becomes your destiny

Smile in pleasure, smile in pain; Smile when trouble pours like rain; Smile when someone hurts U, Smile coz someone cares 4 U. Keep Smiling:)

12
Dec

Teliti itu penting!

Teliti itu penting!

Sekumpulan pelajar perubatan berkumpul untuk melihat
seorang pensyarah
melakukan pemeriksaan ke atas satu mayat..mereka
berkumpul mengelilingi
tempat mayat itu diletakkan..
"Dalam bidang perubatan, ada 2 kualiti yang sgt
penting untuk menjadi
seorang doktor", kata pensyarah itu.

"Pertama.., kamu semua tidak boleh jijik melihat
mayat", katanya…sebagai
contoh, pensyarah itu mencucuk satu jarinya ke dalam
mulut mayat,
menariknya semula dan menjilat jarinya itu.

"Sekarang, cuba kamu buat", kata pensyarah itu.
Selepas beberapa ketika, barulah mereka mengikut apa
yang mereka lihat.
Seorang demi seorang memasukkan jari ke mulut mayat
dan menjilatnya.
Apabila semua pelajar selesai, pensyarah itu memandang
ke arah mereka dan
berkata….

"Kualiti kedua yang sangat penting adalah pemerhatian
yang tajam. Seperti
tadi….saya memasukkan jari hantu tetapi menjilat
jaritelunjuk. ….

SEKARANG…. .TUMPUKAN PERHATIAN… .PAHAM!!!